Bullies and Gangs-Differences and Similarities

More child on child violence resulting in death with headlines reading Children Killing Children. Most recently reported on has has been the increase of it in Chicago. Okay, this is gang related violence and I am more interested in discussing bullying and its affects...so then, what is the difference between gangs and bullies?

Similarities:
1. Low Self-Esteem. Gang leaders and members suffer from low self-esteem just as bullies suffer from low self-esteem.

2. Imbalance of Power. In this case, you can say that there is bullying within the gang itself. Gang leaders force members to commit specific crimes and the members themselves can suffer greatly if they don't. Bullies always choose a victim that they can hold power over.

3. Group of people against another group or person. Gangs are always made up of groups. Many children join them just for that reason; they are looking for a sense of belonging or family and finding it in the wrong place. Sometimes bullies appear to be powerful and attract others who join in with them to feel they are part of a strong group as well.


Differences:
1. Victims. The victim of a bully is picked on verbally and or physically over and over again. The victim is constantly tormented often for no other purpose than the bully needs to feel his/her power over another who is weaker. The victim of a gang may be "bullied"in this way, but more often the purpose of this bullying (if it is constant) is to intimidate to stay away from territory, pay money, or some other criminal purpose. Many times the victim isn't even bullied at all. The victim could be a randomly selected person chosen to be killed in retaliation for something else against the gang, or the victim could be a completely unrelated innocent person "caught in the crossfire".

Bullying is escalating to Death

A boy was stabbed and killed at his Coral Gables, FL school last week. I didn't know the boy, but I cried for him. And that's just the latest victim (that I know of)...there has been such a high incidence of violence at schools these days! This is what happens when bullying escalates. It is not harmless when teasing starts in kindergarten. It is not "child's play" when a girl is constantly pushed around because she is "too fat to pass by without bumping into her." If adults don't step in and fill their children with self-esteem and respect for others, we can expect to see more "bullying" escalating to death.

The new Tomgirlz book, ABBEY's TURN, is another fun to read chapter book full of surprising silliness, but the underlying messages in this book are serious and important to me. This book demonstrates the issues of bullying, teasing, childhood obesity, and how children can deal with these problems. The book is actually a tool to show children (in a fun way that doesn't preach to them) what bullying looks like, how the victim is affected, and how they can stop the problem.

Over the next several months, the TOMGIRLZ platform will be focused on anti-bullying. I hope you will visit often to participate in the discussion, learn about contests we will be hosting (with great prizes!), and stay focused on anti-bully campaigns and their effectiveness. My hope is to one day see the term 'bully' removed from the dictionary! Wouldn't that be cool?